I have to admit, when my lover of several years said he needed a break from our loving relationship, almost all I could think of was "How do I get my ex boyfriend back now?"

I became as troubled as any other woman would be in that scenario, but when I really sat down to think it over, I saw there were just simply three different responses to that old question of "How to get my boyfriend back?" I've listed them all for you here.

Option #1: Go to him

If you've just barely split up, this is perhaps the method your heart's indicating you-no, shouting for you-to use. You want to drive over to his home with French maid's dress and a bottle of massage oil and apologize, beg, and bat your eyelashes until finally he forgives you.

Unfortunately, next to pretty much running over his family pet, this is possibly the very best way to make sure the split up is final. It makes you look mentally unstable and like someone who can't really handle life alone.

Sometimes those tearful, lovelorn pleas work on us ladies, however they usually have the reverse effect on males, who aren't as confident with open displays of emotion as we are. As a result, even a little thing like sending a mushy love note is just counter productive. That's why I made a decision this wasn't the answer to that question of how should I get my ex boyfriend back.

Option #2: Let him come to you!

No! I don't suggest sitting by the phone all night praying for him to call. I really mean going about life as if you'd never met Mister what's-his-name, simply stopping to let virtually any mutual friend of yours know that you're still single and even theoretically willing to speak to your ex.

If you really think your guy will quickly come to realize what a mistake it was to let you go (eg he's made this mistake previously), you're probably safe with this route. Otherwise, though, it's fairly risky.

You're depending on the fact that he's still thinking about you when in fact he may be off on Caribbean cruise interested in anything but his ex-girlfriend.

Option #3: Work through friends!

Recruiting mutual associates to help in reuniting both you and your guy is not only effective, it's also a perfectly respectable, as opposed to the French maid outfit thing. The reason this works is because his buddies will be able to frame your current outpouring of longing in the manner your guy can relate to and, moreover, that doesn't freak him out.

The secret here is to choose one and only one of his friends to help you out. Don't start off calling everyone whose number you have in hopes of overwhelming him using attacks from all sides.

You'll mutually dilute the effect and make you look desperate. Just pick one good friend and ask if they'd been ready to convey a message to your ex. If they are, be as open and sincere as you can be about what happened and how you're feeling.

I can tell you, sitting home thinking "How do I get my boyfriend back?" won't do you a lot of good. Ultimately, you have the best chance for winning him back by signing up a friend of his for help. But, you can improve on the options above by seeking recommendations of a professional relationship therapist.

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